You ever have days where everything seems to pile on top of you at once? Your car got towed, then you got chewed out by your boss for being late, which led to you having an attitude at Starbucks and getting a double mocha iced latte poured on your head right in front of the cutie you’ve been eyeballing for a week. That sounds like an average Tuesday for me.
On days like these, it’s very easy to forget the little things that we take for granted that could possibly turn a frown upside down. Here are ten that I am thankful for.
Thank God, I don’t have smelly feet – Because the rubber and plastic burning in my chimney smell like the pits of hell. It has never been easier to be a “sneaker head” in America where new color waves, schemes, and designs seem to emerge every second. Gone are the days of simple stamp collection. Now, these hobbies can range upward of $3,000 for one special edition item.
Thank God, my allergies haven’t started yet – Because that means I have a few more days of bliss before my endless torment begins. My allergies have turned the spring seasons into the most miserable three months of the year. Instead of being able to enjoy the decadence of the spring foliage, I am ensnared with an endless cycle of Kleenex, Benadryl, and eye drops. However, going through this life-altering anguish helps me appreciate, more so than others, the other nine months out of the year. The blistering heat of the summer, the bone-chilling wind of the fall, and the frozen landscape of the winter all resonate as parts of the beautiful, enduring, sequence of nature.
Thank God, I have a college degree – Because you can never have enough paperweights. I’m kidding, sort of. In this day and age, the impracticality that comes with the venturing off to college should at least cause any potential student to pause and reflect on their coming decision. The average student leaves college with over ten thousand dollars in debt and sometimes as high as six figures. When the realization that the prospect of getting a decent paying job is ridiculously low coupled with the thousands of similarly unemployed recent grads, the value of a college degree seems to be shrinking more than the U.S dollar. While it is becoming more of a requirement to possess one to perform even the most entry level of positions, the fact of the matter is you don’t necessarily need one to become successful. Now earning a degree has become more of a life milestone than a life changing achievement.
Thank God, my mother hasn’t charged me rent yet – Because my section 8 has not been approved yet. Being a freeloading sack of dirty dishes and unwashed laundry is much less disheartening when your roommate has cleaned your feces daily at one point. Eventually, most people realize that they can never repay their mother’s love. In that, some may make it their life goal to become a symbol of pride for the earliest, and sometimes only, a symbol of unconditional love that few will get to experience. A mother’s love is one currency that can only be given and never repaid and a child’s aspirations would be that framed receipt.
Thank God, I started watching sports a few years ago – Because now I can hold conversations with men and pretend like I know what I’m talking about. Sports in America have become so engrained in our culture that these now gladiators of modern times take on mythic proportions. Certain idols have become so dehumanized that to speak of them must be heeded with overt caution. To understand this is to understand America, where systems that are wildly known to be insufficiently broken are held in place by the legends wrought from idols of history. Had Benjamin Franklin played for the Boston Celtics our national flag would have been a four-leaf clover.
Thank God for Netflix – Because chill. The phenomenon of Netflix has created an environment where conversation and social interaction have become secondary to new episodes of Bob’s Burgers. It’s used as almost an escape from the daily rigors of life as writing, music, and art once were. This now leaves us to wonder, will the following generation have only images of satires, documentaries, and dramas to look upon as our legacies.
Thank God for the internet – Because Timmy Turner was right, everything leads back to the internet. The internet has most likely become the greatest invention of the 20th century. It has opened the world and made it smaller, and broken the boundaries of human information. We now have at our disposal, more information than millions of people could process in their entire lifetime; as well as an infinite amount of funny cat videos on YouTube.
Thank God for Marvel Comics movies – Because I needed a reason to continue to go to the movies. The film industry is constantly looking for the next compelling concept. Right now, that would be, grown men in tights. For decades, the fantasies, stories, and dramas of comics have enraptured in scoped minds. It has now become the time to bring those tales from the little page to the big screen.
Thank God for beards – Because they catch all of the crumbs that would have otherwise fallen on my clothing. They are also a personal identifier to match a person’s personality. Like snowflakes and Olsen twins, no two beards are exactly alike and each represents different characteristics and aspects of their suitor.
Thank God for Franklin at the tollbooth – Because I sure as hell didn’t have that one dollar and twenty-five cents to make it through the tollbooth. Sometimes it’s the simplest and smallest forms of generosity that can turn a relatively horrid day, into a special one.